Suicide Prevention Awareness, PTSD and the Combat Veteran Mind.....

So, for those of you who didn't already know, September was National Suicide Prevention Awareness month.  But here's something else you should know.  We are standing at a rate of 22 Veteran Suicides per month.  22!

These are the men and women who fought for this country, and on it's behalf. On YOUR behalf.  I'm a combat vet, and these are my brothers and sisters in arms.  They are my battle buddies.  So, suicide prevention awareness needs to be EVERY month.  22 vets we lose per day is far far FAR too many. What is the cause?  Well, in WWII they called it "Shell Shock". In Vietnam and Korea they called it "Battle Fatigue". Today it is known as Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD).  It's that final little "screw you" that war leaves behind on it's participants. The Army is who I will take to task here, because that is my experience.  I wasn't a Marine, Sailor or Airman, so I don't know as much about their training methods, but the Army's I know intimately.  You see, for an armored crewman, the training cycle (OSUT) is 16 weeks.  !6 weeks with the same peers, the same Drill Sergeants, the same barracks, the same training environment.  For 16 weeks, you are taken and broken. Every remnant of the uncivilized, disorganized, knucklehead of a civilian you once were "back on the block" is destroyed, decimated, and removed from your life, and in it's place is built an efficient killing machine. An armor-centric, egotistical, billy-badass who is more than ready to put steel on target

.....until the day he does it. Until the horrific reality of what an APDS, HEAT or HEP round does to another human being is openly displayed before our very eyes, along with the knowledge that that was a father/son/brother/uncle moments earlier, before you pulled your trigger. You see, when you volunteer to be part of a wartime army, you don't realize that it's a lifetime of memories you'll wish you didn't have, when it's all over.  

Not everyone is mentally or emotionally equipped to accept that.

 

Not everyone is mentally or emotionally equipped to live with that.  There are many of us that live with the memories, the nightmares, the inconsiderate civilians who ask insensitive questions like "did you kill anyone?". Some of us can't handle the hatred displayed by the peace-creeps, the lack of understanding from our loved ones when we come home. NO we aren't the same person you knew before we left. How COULD we be? How do you expect that we could live through all we have, seen the destruction, held our friends as they gasped their last breath, had others leave and never return and be at peace?.

 We've smelled burning flesh, watched the aftermath of this war we never asked for

.....and we can't return to you the same as we once were!  Some of us just want the visions, fear, nightmares, to end.  

Suicide Prevention Awareness month is not only about veterans and veteran  suicides....but that is the part of it that effects me the most, and I am most passionate about.  I have been one that wanted it all to go away, and in fact, I still am most days.  I just wont choose that permanent solution. At least not today.

Love your veterans, hug your soldiers, sailors, airmen and marines. Let us know that you're there for us, even if you can't necessarily UNDERSTAND what we feel, that you WANT to, and love us regardless 

To ANY and ALL of my Battles, no matter your service, before you make that ultimate decision, call me. I'm here, I've been there, and i'll listen while you talk, yell, scream, cry...I'm here. I love you unconditionally and I share your pain.  Anytime, day or night, I'll be here for you

574-849-4494

SSG Wade C. "Lion" Lindwedel

19X3PB4

USA (Ret)